Tuesday, September 23, 2003

Screamers



I’m not getting on that thing.

Aww maan!! C’mon!! We’re HERE!!?!

So?! I came to the amusement park to help out with the kids and enjoy the day, I don’t DO that kinda sh’t.

Whatsa matter? You scaid??

Yep!

I thought you was Mr. “I Ain’t NEVA Scaid!”..what happened to all that??

That’s just a rap lyric mane..don’t try to call me out.

So you know, YOU can’t sing that song anymore?

Whateva.

Mr. Big Bad “I sleep with 2 Glock’s in my bed” Neva Scaid is afraid of a roller coaster that KIDS laugh and play on? Huh??

Look..let me gone and tell you like this so that you will leave me alone…all that going up in the air real fast and twirling and twisting around, then rushing back down so fast that your balls go all the way up to the top of your stomach?? That’s not ME..I tried it..I didn’t like it..and I ain’t NEVA getting on one of those things again. Now for all you thrill seekers wanna jump out of a plane crazies..ya’ll go right ahead and enjoy yourself.

But that’s the whole THRILL of it!!? Don’t you like that feeling of riding through the air??!

Hell naw! If God wanted me to fly He would have gave me some wings! I don’t like roller coasters and stuff like that, because all I can think about is that the car will jump off the track and everybody on it, including me, being read about on the front page of the newspaper the next morning.

Aww man..you can never enjoy life if all you worry about is ‘what if’..when its your time to punch out, its just your time. Rollercoasters are safer than driving on the freeway!

Whateva mane..I still ain’t getting on it.

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Some people really enjoy the ‘thrill’ that roller coaster’s and amusement park rides can bring. The experience of having your stomach turn flip flops while being helplessly transported by a man made machine challenging the laws of gravity. Others ride just for the opportunity to scream their lungs out in a public place and not having to worry about being considered ’weird’. And then there’s that smaller group who ride actually HOPING that a catastrophe will happen. They’re screamers too, its just that their screams are silent and not via their vocal chords.

There's a myriad of reasons to enjoy roller coasters; for the anticipation it brings, while waiting in line (which are usually the longest in the park), the scream effect and the feeling of accomplishment you have when the ride is over. First time riders should make sure to pay careful attention to people who are getting off of the ride. If they’re all laughing with flushed faces and their hair is all over the place?..then that’s a good one. If they’re crying, sobbing, drenched in sweat or look like they’ve just used the bathroom on themselves?..then that’s a REALLY good one!

Personally, the best thing I like about roller coasters is the moment of release it gives. Flying through the air at accelerating speeds on a machine that I have absolutely no control over causes a complete helplessness, which in turn gives me a sense of freedom and enlightenment that vitalizes the spirit and really makes me feel ALIVE. Fortunately, I already feel very much alive with my 2 feet on the ground, so I don’t actively SEEK OUT these thrills. But if I’m in an amusement park and somebody needs a riding podna? I ain’t neva scaid. Unless of course its one of those round-n’-round rides..I can’t do those without revisiting my last meal.

We all should have our ‘release zones’ where we can just go and scream our lungs out. Some people do the roller coaster thing, some people go to sporting events, some do all of their screaming in the bedroom and some (especially the sanctified & Baptist folk) do their screaming at church. No matter the venue, screamers are letting it out..and its always good to have an outlet to ‘let it out’. Some people ‘scream’ for attention by the way they dress or carry themselves in a public place. Whether there’s a deficiency in their lives or they’re just the kind of people who can never have too much attention, the screams are still there. We’re living in a society and economy in which a growing mass of people are ‘quietly living on the brink of desperation’. Financial woes, rocky relationships, employment issues, health problems, dealing with haters..everybody is dealing with something. The task for all is to stay focused on your goals, shake the haters off and scream when you feel like you need a release. Just make sure to show discretion when and where you scream..roller coasters are a great place to start, if you ain‘t scaid. :)


The roller coaster pictured above is The Nemesis at Alton Towers in Staffordshire, United Kingdom. You can find out more about this roller coaster and many others at http://www.coastercentral.com.



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